Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is complex, subtle and multifaceted. And while there are many potential indications that a leader has a high level of EQ, none is a stronger “tell” than the way that a leader handles criticism. Handling criticism is challenging for leaders because they often face pressure to maintain a positive self-image and project confidence. Criticism can be seen as a threat to their ego and reputation, challenging their perceived competence and authority. As a result, they may become defensive or dismissive, fearing that acknowledging criticism will undermine their leadership position.

Criticism of a leader can evoke a fear of failure and the potential repercussions that may follow. They may worry about the impact of negative feedback on their career prospects, job security or professional standing, leading to resistance or defensiveness.

Criticism often implies the need for change or improvement, and some leaders may be resistant to change, particularly if they have a fixed mindset or are comfortable with their existing methods and practices. They may perceive criticism as a personal attack or an indication that their way of doing things is flawed, which can evoke resistance or deflection.

EQ and Self-Awareness

Leaders who lack self-awareness may struggle to handle criticism effectively. They may have limited insight into their own strengths and weaknesses, making it difficult to receive feedback with an open mind. Without self-awareness, they may be more prone to reacting defensively or failing to recognize the value of constructive criticism.

Leaders often occupy positions of authority and power within organizations. This power dynamic can create a barrier to receiving criticism openly. Subordinates may hesitate to provide honest feedback for fear of negative repercussions or a perceived lack of receptiveness from their leaders. As a result, leaders may not receive the critical input they need to improve.

Emotional Resilience

Receiving criticism can evoke negative emotions, such as frustration, disappointment or even anger. Leaders need to develop emotional resilience to manage these emotions effectively and respond constructively to feedback. However, if they struggle with emotional regulation, criticism may trigger an emotional response that hinders their ability to handle it objectively.

Leaders often have demanding schedules and numerous responsibilities. Amidst these pressures, finding the time and mental space to process and address criticism can be challenging. They may prioritize immediate tasks and overlook the importance of engaging with feedback, leading to delayed or insufficient responses.

Overcoming these challenges requires exceptional emotional intelligence: self-awareness, a growth mindset, and a commitment to personal and professional development.

This makes it all the more remarkable whenever we observe a leader who handles criticism with grace, confident humility, openness and even a bit of self-deprecating humor. By recognizing the value of constructive criticism, leaders like this can create a culture that encourages open feedback, fosters growth, and strengthens their own leadership effectiveness. Emotionally intelligent leaders handle criticism in a constructive and effective manner, recognizing its value as an opportunity for growth and learning. Here are some EQ best practices to train leaders on:

• Remain calm and self-reflect.

Emotionally intelligent leaders manage their emotions when receiving criticism. They avoid reacting defensively or impulsively and instead take a moment to collect themselves. They practice self-reflection and examine their own actions and behaviors objectively to assess the validity of the criticism.

• Practice active listening.

Emotionally intelligent leaders actively listen to the feedback they receive. They give their full attention to the person providing the criticism, demonstrating genuine interest in understanding their perspective. They avoid interrupting or becoming defensive, allowing the speaker to express their concerns or observations fully.

• Seek clarification and understand the intent.

To ensure a clear understanding, emotionally intelligent leaders seek clarification regarding the specific points of criticism. They ask questions to gain a deeper understanding of the issue and the intentions behind the feedback. This helps them grasp the underlying concerns and avoid misinterpretation.

• Embrace a growth mindset.

Emotionally intelligent leaders adopt a growth mindset, viewing criticism as an opportunity for personal and professional development. They recognize that feedback provides valuable insights and different perspectives that can help them improve their skills, behaviors and decision-making processes. They appreciate the chance to learn and grow from the experience.

• Separate personal and professional aspects.

Emotionally intelligent leaders are adept at separating their personal identity from their professional roles. They understand that criticism is directed at their actions, decisions or behaviors, rather than their inherent worth as individuals. This distinction allows them to approach criticism objectively and respond in a constructive manner.

• Respond with gratitude and appreciation.

Emotionally intelligent leaders appreciate those who provide them with constructive criticism. They express gratitude for the feedback, acknowledging the effort and courage it takes for others to share their honest opinions. This response encourages open communication and builds trust within the team.

• Take ownership and accountability.

Emotionally intelligent leaders take ownership of their actions and accept responsibility for any shortcomings or mistakes identified through criticism. They do not make excuses or shift blame onto others. Instead, they demonstrate accountability and commit to making the necessary changes or improvements based on the feedback received.

• Communicate and follow up.

After receiving criticism, emotionally intelligent leaders engage in open and transparent communication. They may seek further discussion with the person providing the feedback to clarify any remaining questions or concerns. Additionally, they follow up with action steps to demonstrate their commitment to addressing the feedback and making positive changes.

• Learn and adapt.

Emotionally intelligent leaders view criticism as an opportunity to learn and adapt their approach. They integrate the lessons learned from feedback into their future actions and decision-making processes. They continuously strive to improve themselves, taking the necessary steps to prevent similar issues from arising in the future.

In summary, emotionally intelligent leaders approach criticism with composure, active listening, and a growth mindset. They separate their personal and professional identities, respond with gratitude, take ownership of their actions, and engage in open communication.

By embracing criticism as a tool for growth, emotionally intelligent leaders foster a culture of learning and continuous improvement within their teams and organizations.